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The Sideshow

The Sideshow Ep. 18: monologue material

A British reverend has likened John Howard to the man who ordered the execution of Jesus. I disagree; Howard would never order Jesus be executed. He’d be detained indefinitely on Christmas Island instead, which for Jesus means a non-stop birthday party! But Howard would never order the execution of Jesus. He’d get a minister to […]

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The Sideshow

The Sideshow Ep. 17: monologue material

Tonight – bearded ladies, sword swallowers and other names for Liberal ministers. Smears! Last week, a story circulated about Kevin Rudd having heart surgery. Now there’s a rumour about a married govt. minister who is secretly gay, visits bath houses and is having an affair with one of his male staffers. In particular, one of […]

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The Sideshow

The Sideshow Ep. 16: monologue material

Kevin Rudd’s launched his election campaign already. In fact he’s so sure of becoming PM now that he thought he was able to announce the election date himself. John Howard’s still stretching out the date of the election as he heads towards the three year mark of this term. I think he’s hoping that if […]

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The Sideshow

The Sideshow Episode 15: monologue material

Howard’s language and image seems to have changed as he desperately tries to appeal to younger voters. After the APEC cultural showcase, John Howard used these words: “I felt stoked that my country had such talented artists.” When asked about the conference in general, he said that “APEC totally owns”, and that (mime turntables) “wikiwikiwikiwikiworld […]

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The Sideshow

The Sideshow Ep. 14: monologue material

APEC SCHMAPEC The APEC summit has finally delivered a knockout punch to climate change. The leaders agreed to a non-binding agreement, still to be ratified, agreeing on non-specific targets for the in-principle reduction of unspecified greenhouse gasses over a generally gradual time at some stage in the not-too-distant future. Perhaps. All agreed that global warming […]

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The Sideshow

The Sideshow Ep. 13: monologue material

THE HORROR OF APEC Imagine living in a backward dictatorship where police can randomly body-search anyone they like, where they can detain people without any bail or even an actual charge, and where they can stop the public from entering public spaces – using concrete walls and water cannons! Well, imagine no more – welcome […]

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The Sideshow

The Sideshow Ep. 12: monologue material

And it’s been revealed that Kevin Rudd was stumbling drunk in a New York strip club 4 years ago. Of course, this will change many people’s opinion of him: now he’s PM for sure! Of course, this has changed many people’s opinion of him: the latest polls show that people will only vote for him […]

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The Sideshow

The Sideshow Ep. 11: monologue material

Well, we’re back at the all-new time of 9:25 Saturday nights… and that means more blog posts of Mat & Wok’s weekly brain dump. Here’s last week’s material for the stories that went to air. John Howard, Australia’s own Master of the Ring, has stamped his tiny foot and told the Iraqi government to work […]

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The Sideshow

The Sideshow: soon to return at a later time + Ep. 10 monologue material

Hi folks, well, looks like we’ve got a bit of time off… in case you didn’t see it, the show is on a break and will return on Saturday August 18th at the new time of 9:30pm. The show is scheduled to return to the 7:30 timeslot later in the year. (UPDATE 9/7/07: It now […]

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The Sideshow

The Sideshow Ep. 9: monologue material

In the US, anti-terror chiefs have hired a team of science-fiction writers to dream up new techniques to win the war on terror. After all, it is a fictional war on an imaginary enemy. The Americans have been great at inventing vibrant characters, bizarre plotlines and fabricated evidence, they just need a bit of help […]