Free and open imprisoned opposition (GNW 17/8/09: 7 Days In 7 Seconds)

Burma’s military leaders, the men who put the “junt” in junta, sentence democracy leader Aung San Suu Kyi to a further 18 months of house arrest after yet another sham trial. Hello? Coalition of the Willing, anyone? HELLO??

It was a sham trial. Although, granted, at least the guns were real.

Of course the elections will be fair. You can either vote for the government, or vote to join her in captivity.

Of course, the Western world would LOVE to help her out, but her trouble is, she isn’t rich in petroleum. / but she just isn’t filled with vast untapped reservoirs of oil.

Next year’s elections will be multi-party, and candidate registration will close shortly, so as to allow time for the trials. / so there’s enough time for sentencing.

But I’m sure the elections will still be fair & open. In an unfair, closed way – Burma’s speciality!

The sentence means she’ll still be in detention during the promised multi-party elections next year. Which is a shame – she LOVES to party.

Here’s hoping she wins another landslide election that the rulers can ignore. It’s democracy – junta-style!

Suu Kyi has been in detention for 14 of the past 20 years, since the junts refused to recognise her landslide election victory in 1990. But seriously, it’s a blessing in disguise – I mean, do you really want to be the leader of Burma? Sounds like it’s full of total arseholes.

She’s been placed under house arrest for another 18 months after an American Mormon swam to her house. Not illegal in most countries, but Burma loves to pioneer legislation.

Although really, kidnap and imprisonment are sometimes the best thing for an Opposition Leader. / are sometimes the only way to get your politicians to SHUT UP. / are sometimes totally deserved. You hear me Mr Turnbull?

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