Shocking Rudd (GNW 9/11/09: 7 Days In 7 Seconds)

Kevin Rudd picked the winner of the Melbourne Cup, Shocking. Rudd hasn’t been that thrilled since he was given the right meal on the plane.

So clearly if he’s tipped us to triumph in Afghanistan, we’re going to damn well triumph in Afghanistan!

Rudd was flabbergasted. He had just been explaining that he was shocking at tipping, not that he was tipping Shocking.

Makes you realise we haven’t seen Kevin’s “happy face” for over a year now. / since late 2007.

He was so surprised, it knocked the fascinator right off his head.

Ooh, looks like someone’s been given the white meat!

Shocking’s win was nearly as shocking as Rudd’s Cup Day poll results.

The last winner Rudd picked was his ear.

Now we know who’s been hanging around with the bookies and sharks of the underworld.

Rudd was thrilled that he picked the winner of the cup, as it meant five minutes when no-one asked him about asylum seekers.

Maybe we should get some of Kevin’s bookies looking into the odds in Afghanistan…

He’s such a sports-mad freak, our PM – I mean, just look at him!

He enjoyed his victory with a can of beer and a glass of champers. Not alcopops, they’re EVIL. / they’re too expensive.

With his winnings, he could even afford to down a few alcopops.

Rudd hadn’t actually tipped Shocking, he was just happy the winner wasn’t Alcopop.

With his winnings, he’ll be able to pull Australia out of the financial crisis! / he’ll be able to balance the budget!

Greens leader Bob Brown said the Government should seize the $420,000 third prize which was going to Chechen dictator Ramzan Kadyrov. Better off sending it to that nice Mr Putin.

While Rudd’s pick emerged triumphant, Malcolm Turnbull chose Viewed, who came home seventh. So things are definitely picking up for him too.

Tony Abbott felt fate was giving him a tip when there was a horse running called Warringah, the name of his electorate. Unfortunately Warringah ran last. I think fate might be saying Abbott should join Costello and Nelson… / Still did better than John Howard’s tip: Phar Lap.

Leave a Reply