Give the ump a thumb-pull (The Glass House 12/7/06)

Russian tennis-ball-hitting-person Dmitry Tursunov faces a large fine and possibly suspension after a series of attacks on umpire Fergus Murphy: clubbing the ball at his chair, trying to pull him out of the chair when shaking the ump’s hand, and later comparing him to Saddam Hussein. But at least he’s not a sore loser.

At the press conference Tursonov described Murphy as an idiot and compared him to Saddam Hussein. That’s Saddam Hussein, the notoriously average tennis umpire. Not the brutal ex-dictator. Hope there wasn’t any confusion there.

Ump Murphy did admit later that he had gassed the odd Kurd, but not nearly as many as Saddam.

The umpire said the comparison was insulting and unfounded, before retiring to his palace for a spot of genocide.

When shaking Murphy’s hand after his loss, Tursunov tried to drag him out of his chair by pulling his thumb. Murphy did make the fart noise though, so everyone’s happy.

But it’s all been a misunderstanding – after a tantrum, the umpire had just told him to “pull his thumb out”…

Tursunov had been angered by some dubious line calls, and also the umpire’s concluding remark of “Thank you linesmen, thank you ballboys, fuck you you Russian twat.”

Tursunov had always wanted to play tennis, even since he first saw John McEnroe chuck a wobbly. “It’s been a lifelong ambition of mine to come to Wimbledon and throw a massive tanty.”

Seems like pretty poor treatment of an umpire who began the match with an instruction to “love all”…

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