Categories
Glass House

Rogues’ Gallery (The Glass House 9/8/06)

Bush and Bunny
– “Let the madness commence!”
– Slow and steady wins the race…
– Bush blows a whistle to announce the appointment of the new US Defence Minister.
– Dick Cheney finally gets a turn in the bunny suit.
– Flopsy Cottontail – the next governor of Texas.
– Osama bin Laden really is the master of disguise!
– Bush still on the hunt for a Rabbit of Mass Destruction.
– Mad hatter forgets hat.
– Dubya in Wonderland finds whistle that says “Blow me”.
– Dubya officially starts the “War on Sanity”.
– Tough gig being most powerful man of Earth: bombing civilians one day, blowing whistles with giant rabbits the next.
– Rabbit found behind Bush.
– International Rodent Soccer Day opened by whistling Bush.
– Rabbit shocked: President eats whistle.
– Rabbit fooled by lifelike President suit.

Arnie & Tony
– The good Terminator finally befriends the liquid metal Terminator.
– (through clenched teeth) “Not now Tony, I think the camera’s on us…”
– In public, Tony and Arnie could only rub foreheads.
– World leaders enjoy a Vulcan mind-meld.
– Diplomacy is much simpler now, although telekinesis only works at very short range.
– (Tony:) “Is that an environmental bill in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?”
– Teflon Tony and the Terminator grease each others’ sprockets.
– “Hasta la vista, Tony.”
– “Don’t worry baby – I’ll be back.”
– (Tony:) “Gosh, Arnold – I’m married.”
– (Tony:) “My word, that is a very hard muscle.”
– (Tony:) “My, is it hot in here, or is that just climate change?”
– (Tony:) “Say it one more time Arnie… oooh, you make me feel like a schoolgirl again.”
– Arnold and Tony push for gay marriage.
– Terminator 4: Headbutt Day
– The Terminator meets the Terminal.
– “I’ll swallow if you do.”
– “Can you believe they re-elected George?”
– “It’s not a tumour – it’s the British PM!”

Pammy & Kid wed
– They saved the traditional wedding dress for the honeymoon video.
– Pamela was too busy with her intricate wedding gown to check her hat was straight.
– Pamela had always dreamed of a traditional fake tan wedding.
– Kid Rock was looking forward to their honeymoon when they could finally strip down to their tendons.
– Pamela Anderson: captain of the Good Ship Boobies.
– The bride stripped bare.
– And if the ship sinks, everyone can use Pammy as a floatation device.
– Kid Rock’s got it all: booze, cigars, sluts – why’d he ruin it by getting married?
– Pammy checks her wedding dress is still covering her enormous breasts.
– Pamela gives Kid Rock a wedding present: a couple of showbags.
– Captain Pammy checks her floaties.
– Pammy and Kid Rock decide to get bouncy castle for wedding.
– Less clothes equals less time wasted on wedding night…
– Kid Rock’s special day only happens once, but he’ll always treasure those special mammaries.

By Wok and Mat

Warwick Holt and Mat Blackwell are long-time writing partners, who created the mega-award winning web series Bruce, and wrote loads of jokes for TV shows including Good News Week, The Sideshow and The Glass House. Several years of their raw material for those shows is posted right here on this blog.

Leave a Reply