Witch-taxing (The Glass House 13/9/06)

Romanian tax officials are looking to crack down on witches by ordering a census. Witches are outraged. But surely they can just magic up some extra money to pay it?

Witches shouldn’t really qualify for tax exemption. Particularly black witches – making a voodoo doll isn’t really charity work.

As the Mayor said, “If they want to get a tax exemption, they’re just going to have to believe in a real religion, not all this imaginary hocus pocus!”

Have you ever tried to get a Tax Invoice out of an Eye-of-newt vendor?

Australians are way ahead – we’ve been paying off our HECS for years…

They can afford to pay broom tax – think of how much they’re saving on petrol!

Although, by taxing witches, they may have opened a can of worms – and a few packets of newts.

You should see them at tax return time:
“Bubble bubble toil and trouble
Deductions make and rebates double!”

“Spill the blood when the moon doth wax:
And try to claim it off your tax.”

“Lizard’s eye and octopus suction:
Hope I get a tax reduction.”

“First you add the newt’s blood, warm:
Put it into your BAS form.”

“Cauldron bubble, fire burn;
Claim them in my tax return”

Bucharest’s Mayor said that witches “need to be made to follow the same laws as everyone else. Except maybe the laws of physics.”

If they do have to pay tax, they should at least get a tax abracadabreak.

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