Smurfy boxer (The Glass House 11/10/06)

Smurfy boxerGerman boxing champion Arthur Abraham of Armenia faces legal action if he continues to wear a Smurf hat and enter the ring to Smurf music. A spokesmurf said, “This smurf can’t just smurf around smurfing like he smurfs the smurf! It’s a smurfing smurf for smurfing out smurf!”

At least, they think he’s going to be sued. If you’ve ever listened to smurfs talk it’s pretty difficult to work out what they’re saying – especially when they’re angry.

At least, they think he’s going to be sued. It’s pretty difficult to work out what they’re saying – except that it’s pretty smurfy.

If it’s not sorted out soon, it will lead to a protracted legal battle; and that could get smurfy.

The Peyo company has organised a top legal team: the wizard Gargamel and his cat.

He’s not allowed to wear the smurf hat or use the smurf music. But he is allowed to continue living in a toadstool.

He’s currently light-heavyweight champion. Win two more bouts and he could be Papa Smurf! / But he has plans to enter the light-smurfyweight division!

The smurf hat is a key part of his boxing tactics. It contains a brick.

The German boxing ranks are looking pretty thin these days. Once opponents have been beaten up by a smurf, they tend to retire out of embarrassment.

Abraham certainly hopes he wins the court-case: if Smurfette ever finds out he’s not really a Smurf, their marriage is over.

But Abraham’s lawyer says he’s got a plan that’ll get those pesky smurfs once and for all: he’s sending in his cat Azrael…

The whole court case is stupid: don’t they know smurfs aren’t even real? And that they crumble in the witness box?

Of course, The Smurf Song was originally performed by Father Abraham. It turned out that Arthur Abraham had just misheard and thought he’d performed the song. (Cut him some slack, he is a boxer.)

Abraham was surprised by the threatened lawsuit. “What smurf hat? Oh this? That’s just a glove from an opponent with a really big thumb.”

“This isn’t a hat – when I beat the champion of the Crab-people he gave me his glove as a trophy. I wear it everywhere now. Poor Crab-people.”

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