Obama no vice (Good News Week 17/3/08: Bites)

Barack Obama has rebuffed Hillarys Clinton’s suggestion that he’d make a great Vice-President, or as she’s suggesting calling the position, Presidential Slave. / Chief Slave. / Superslave. / King of the Slaves. / Uncle Tom. / King Nigger.

Hillary has suggested that a Clinton-Obama combination would be “a dream ticket”. Yeah. In her dreams.

Hillary has suggested that a Clinton-Obama combination would be “a dream ticket”. Dreaming of it is easier than actually beating him.

In Hillary’s dream, she defeats Obama and then offers him the vice presidential candidacy. Then they fly away on a unicorn!

Clinton said Obama could have not just the vice-presidency, but a ride in her limo too. / but a free set of steak knives! / but a nice comfy chair.

Obama said, “I’ve won twice as many states as Senator Clinton. I’ve won more of the popular vote than Senator Clinton. I have more delegates than Senator Clinton.” Clinton replied, “Oh yeah? Well… (blow raspberry)! Huh!” / “Oh yeah? Well you stink like poo!” / “Oh yeah? Well you’ve got girl germs!”

Obama said, “I’ve won twice as many states as Senator Clinton. I’ve won more of the popular vote than Senator Clinton. I have more delegates than Senator Clinton. I am the king of the castle and Senator Clinton is the dirty rascal!”

Obama said “I don’t know how somebody who is in second place is offering the vice-presidency to the person who’s in first place.” Well, see Barack, it’s a subtle ploy, a trick, nothing but a ruse! Gee. Maybe he really isn’t ready to be President.

Obama wondered how the second-placed candidate can offer the first-placed candidate second billing. And John Howard wondered why he hadn’t thought of it.

The Clinton campaign has gained traction by suggesting he’s too inexperienced to handle the world’s mightiest military. Obama responded by bombing the bitch. / by bombing her.

As if experience matters in a President. I mean Dubya was inexperienced and yet he made a great… wait a minute!

Of course, most of Hillary Clinton’s campaign has focused on the fact that his name sounds an awful lot like “Osama”.

John McCain is thinking of choosing a really crappy Vice-Presidential candidate, just to belittle Obama further.

President Bush said Obama as Vice-President would be even more dangerous than as President. “That’d mean he’d be running the country – right Dick?”

Obama is fighting back with his new slogan “I may be black, but at least I’m not a woman”.

Many people think Obama has gone too far with his new slogan “At least my wife isn’t fucking an intern with a cigar you dumb bitch.”

Hillary has repeatedly tried to undermine Obama’s credentials by suggesting he couldn’t control the world’s biggest military. He has responded by saying that Hillary couldn’t even control her husband’s cock. / He has responded by saying that Hillary couldn’t even control one heat-seeking missile – the one in her husband’s pants. / one intern-seeking missile.

Obama is unfazed by the battle, and has even offered Hillary a cigar, with a smile and the words “You know where it’s been.”

Clinton is focusing her campaigning on Pennsylvania, where she wooed voters by showing them a home movie of herself as a toddler. Yep, that sure establishes her security credentials.

Clinton is focusing her campaigning on Pennsylvania, where she wooed voters by showing them a home movie of herself as a toddler. Er, to prove how grown up she is now. I guess.

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