Howard not sorry for no sorry (Good News Week 17/3/08: monologue)

Former PM John Howard has continued to argue that an apology to the stolen generations was misguided. He’d prefer an apology to the stolen parliamentarians. / an apology for being so rudely kicked out of office.

The former PM said the apology could create a sense of the indigenous box being “ticked”, when his government could have left that box unticked indefinitely.

The former PM said the apology could create a sense of the indigenous box being “ticked”, when the boxes he thinks a PM should really tick are “arrogant”, “backwards” and “out-of-touch fogey”.

Rudd may not have ticked the indigenous box, but at least he ticked the apology box.

Howard’s still pissed off that hardly anyone ticked his box in the election.

The former PM has remained steadfast in his attitude about the apology despite the obviously grateful reaction from the indigenous people. He still knows what’s best for them. / As if it matters what they think.

Asked about the heartfelt reaction by the Aboriginals in attendance, Howard said he hadn’t noticed – he had his back turned.

Howard said he didn’t actually see the apology – he had his back turned.

Howard thought he had to address the question of the apology again as that Rudd fellow seemed to be getting all the press.

Another reason Howard thought the apology was a mistake was it means Kevin Rudd’s had more global news coverage in his first three months in office than Howard had in his whole 11 years.

Howard believes that one generation can’t accept responsibility for the acts of an earlier generation as a matter of principle, regardless of how well it seems to have worked in practice.

In a series of speeches in the US, Howard has stripped back political doublespeak to reveal that he really is the extremist we suspected all-along. / to reveal his true evil nature. / fascist heart.

Howard said he’s left Australia a prouder nation than before he won government. It’s true, we’re proud we finally turfed him out. / We’re especially proud of finally getting rid of him.

As well as not being sorry for the stolen generations, he’s not sorry for WorkChoices, the GST, children overboard, Cornelia Rau, the illegal invasion of Iraq, and poisoning Phar Lap.

John Howard claims he made Australians proud of their history, rather than ashamed. Because invading a country, stealing the land, chaining up the inhabitants, taking their children, and introducing alcohol are things we should really be proud about.

John Howard claims he made Australians proud of their history, rather than ashamed. Because, not only is invading a country and stealing their resources nothing to be ashamed of, it’s a great way to stay onside with the Americans.

Howard claims he left Australia with a stronger sense of national pride. Well frankly that’s BULLSHIT you snot-nosed little CREEP, the first time I felt proud of being Australian in at least 11 years was when the guy who caned your sorry arse out of the Lodge actually had the common DECENCY to acknowledge our government’s racist past! Oh, “sorry”. / Tick that box, Howard!

Howard is being treated as a hero in American conservative circles, being exactly the type of slimy neo-Nazi that they love.

Howard had pledged that when he left office he wouldn’t become a political commentator. But that was before he realised how bitter he’d become.

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