Warne on hold (The Glass House 23/11/05)

Shane Warne has signed a sponsorship deal with a phone company to record their hold messages, and possibly the hold messages of their customers too. The message goes “If you have recently received a steamy SMS from me, press one. If you have slept with me and are planning to go to the papers, press two. And if that’s Simone – please hold, I’ve only ever loved you, baby!”

“The queue is currently at 5 for 70, and your call will be answered shortly, if I can get my wrong’un working.”

He can leave a message for you: but it’s usually just, “Baby, you’re so hot,” followed by lots of heavy breathing.

“Thanks for calling Nicorette. Cigarette cravings are hard to control. Don’t I know it. In fact I think I’ll have a fag right now…”

“Thanks for calling Winnie Blues. The long smooth smoke that you can’t pay me to give up.”

It was a good deal for Warne – he got paid in extra credit.

Warnie’s back in the good books with sponsors and the public after his recent great form. He’s so busy that he doesn’t have time to talk to his kids much – although he does record them a weekly message on Dial-a-Dad.

Warnie snapped up the deal after he got an SMS saying “We Want U 4 Hot Fone Talk!” – he just couldn’t resist.

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