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Paris is not a dirty word (The Glass House 23/11/05)

Paris Hilton has been voted the star with the biggest ego. Despite having the smallest dog.

Of course, she expected to win.

Paris was disappointed. “It’s like not just the biggest ego – it’s the best!”

“I don’t get it. I don’t even have an eagle.”

Paris was really offended, until someone told her what ‘ego’ meant. “I thought it was another word for ‘butt’!”

Paris is so full of herself she has to empty herself again after each meal.

“Yeah, well, I might have a huge ego, but at least I’m not up myself!”

“Yeah, well, I might have a huge ego, but at least I’m not fat!”

Low on the list of big egos were all those people you’ve never heard of.

Low on the list of big egos was Paris’s youngest sister, Wodonga Hilton.

Paris not only has the biggest ego, but the biggest riots…

Paris not only has the biggest ego, but the biggest Eiffel Tower….

But as Skyhooks said, ego is not a dirty word. I prefer “slutty skank-ho”. Much dirtier.

Apparently Paris split from fiancée Paris Latsis because he didn’t tell his parents that they were engaged. Because it was such a well-kept secret.

By Wok and Mat

Warwick Holt and Mat Blackwell are long-time writing partners, who created the mega-award winning web series Bruce, and wrote loads of jokes for TV shows including Good News Week, The Sideshow and The Glass House. Several years of their raw material for those shows is posted right here on this blog.

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