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Gory Stories (The Glass House 22/3/06)

New movies are getting more blood-soaked than ever. Films like Wolf Creek, Saw II and Hostel are even more gory than The Passion of the Christ… but you wait for Passion of the Christ 2!

It’s gotten to the point where the bad guy has to let the victim recover just so they can generate some more blood.

New extra-gory films due to come out in the next few months include Goretanamo Bay, Abu Grave and The Rumsfeld Home Movies.

There is now more gore on film than ever before. Although this is a good thing, according to Al Gore.

I don’t mind Gore on film. I don’t even mind a bit of Bush on film.

The trend is inspiring a rash of new movies: a sequel to Brokeback Mountain called Spinesnap Hill, a sequel to Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory called Genital Mutilator and the Torture Chamber, and a sequel to The Sound of Music called The Sound of Flesh Being Torn Apart with Meathooks, Eyes Being Prised Out of Sockets, and Music. At last!

You’ve got to admire those horror filmmakers – it takes a lot of guts… / These days making a horror film takes a lot of guts…

Torture films are popular now, especially at Abu Ghraib… only there, they’re called “training videos”.

Abu Ghraib is now charging 14 bucks to watch their “interviews”…

Of course, if you go to Abu Ghraib, you can see the real thing…

By Wok and Mat

Warwick Holt and Mat Blackwell are long-time writing partners, who created the mega-award winning web series Bruce, and wrote loads of jokes for TV shows including Good News Week, The Sideshow and The Glass House. Several years of their raw material for those shows is posted right here on this blog.

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