An online magazine has published workout tips for Islamic extremists planning jihad. Because even suicide bombers want to leave a good looking corpse. Well, bits of one. Because if you believe blowing yourself up is a holy cause, you might as well fully embrace being a meathead. Because why should being a braindead meathead be […]
Author: Wok and Mat
Warwick Holt and Mat Blackwell are long-time writing partners, who created the mega-award winning web series Bruce, and wrote loads of jokes for TV shows including Good News Week, The Sideshow and The Glass House. Several years of their raw material for those shows is posted right here on this blog.
A Russian clown has been told he can no longer wear giant clown shoes in Britain because they pose a safety risk. And that humourous nose could have someone’s eye out. A Russian clown has been told he can no longer wear giant clown shoes in Britain because they pose a safety risk. Plus, that’s […]
It’s annoying, it’s unwanted, and new research says that internet spam is bad for the environment! Although surely not that much worse than every Twitter comment. / Facebook status update. But seriously – is an unwanted “Pleasure Her All Night Long” really much worse than an unwanted “Fred is about to make a coffee”? Apparently […]
Scientists in Japan have created a whole lot of extra-hairy mice. Whatever gets you through the night, eh? A Japanese academic has regenerated hair on mice using embryonic stem cells. Fantastic! Up until now, bald mice had to go to Ashley & Martin. / to go to Advanced Hair – squeak squeak! Fantastic! Up until […]
Tues, May 05 Tuesday sees the outcome of the latest Reserve Bank board meeting: apparently, we’re all doomed! Still! The Reserve Bank board meets again tomorrow. Isn’t it about time they were promoted to the seniors? The Reserve Bank board meets again tomorrow. Sometimes, I really wish they weren’t so reserved. The Reserve Bank board […]
He’s black & hairy, with a white chest & paws, and he’s been in obedience school to make sure he doesn’t wee on the carpet while in the White House. But enough about the president… “Bo” is the Obama’s 6 month-old Portuguese water dog. Apparently the name “Bo” was chosen because Michelle Obama’s late father […]
Bikies! They’re everywhere! It’s Al Qaeda on Harleys! Osama’s disappointed that everyone’s focussed on bikie gangs these days. Before he pulls another September 11, he’s buying a Harley. But all this demonisation ignores the fact that most bikies are perfectly lovely people. It’s only their leaders that we have to be shitscared of. Four bikies, […]
A Fitzroy childcare centre has banned all commercial characters including superheroes and Barbies. They want to brainwash the kids their own way. The John Street Community Early Childhood Co-Op have banned all commercial characters and logos which might be marketing to children. And, to avoid labels of hypocrisy, have also changed their name to “Childcare […]
The Prime Minister has announced a $43 billion plan to bring super-fast internet to the entire country. That’s right folks, we just need to spend $43 billion and we’ll have the fastest porn in the world! Of course with the government’s internet filter in place, we’ll have the fastest access in the world to the […]
A 22 year-old Russian man survived two consecutive leaps from a fifth-floor balcony with only minor cuts and bruises. If at first you don’t sui-ceed, try, try again… He jumped the second time because his wife was telling him off about the first time. And the first time, she was telling him off about the […]