A US craze is spreading to the rest of the world – eyebrow transplants. They look good anywhere! Get five! Thank god! And here was I thinking that the coming depression we’re all about to plunge into was going to be filled with ugly eyebrows. Thank god! We may be about to plunge into a […]
Author: Wok and Mat
Warwick Holt and Mat Blackwell are long-time writing partners, who created the mega-award winning web series Bruce, and wrote loads of jokes for TV shows including Good News Week, The Sideshow and The Glass House. Several years of their raw material for those shows is posted right here on this blog.
A nine-year-old schoolgirl has broken the world record for having the most snails on her face at once: 25. Hot! But look at that tiny 9-year-old face. Where did she fit the other 20 snails? If I hear that there’s been some snail-stacking going on, I will not be happy. In the picture, you can […]
A British school has been criticised for sending kids to isolation cells that a father described as “like Guantanamo Bay”. Well? It is a detention centre. A British school has been criticised for sending kids to isolation cells that a father described as “like Guantanamo Bay”. And, as an extra torture, the kids are sent […]
The world’s first No Star Hotel has opened in Switzerland. The $42 rooms have no views, no room service, no pay TV and limited hot water, but you do get a complimentary peg for your nose. / but at least it’s cramped and dingy. The world’s first No Star Hotel has opened in Switzerland. The […]
Google has implemented a new feature on Gmail that checks for an altered state of mind before letting you email. It also notifies the cops. Google has implemented a new feature on Gmail that checks for an altered state of mind before letting you email. It simply plays some early Pink Floyd, and if you’re […]
Manchester University has relabelled it’s toilets to avoid offending transgender students. Now instead of Ladies and Gents they’re labelled “Toilets” and “Toilets with urinals”. Transgender people are still confused, but now it’s about whether or not they can use a urinal. So rather than classifying people as Women or Men, they’re classifying them as Penises […]
Tues, Nov. 04 And tomorrow is the Melbourne Cup. I don’t know what the fuss is all about, really – if I wanted to see buck-toothed fillies run around in circles trying to be the best, I could go walk down Oxford St. Tomorrow, the race that stops the nation might be overshadowed by the […]
At the moment, Rudd is looking positively Presidential. Though not in the choking-on-a-pretzel, can’t-pronounce-nuclear, invading-random-countries way. But Rudd’s apparently fixing the economic crisis by cutting interest rates and stuffing our pockets with cash! What’s not to like? If only all wartime responses involved handing out bucketloads of loot! If economic crises mean interest rate cuts […]
Over 1000 complaints about the integrity of Australian Federal Police officers were made last financial year, almost half of them made by fellow officers. Turns out even the pigs hate the pigs. The AFP is generally very professional. It’s just a thousand or so bad apples spoiling the barrel. Over 1000 complaints about Australian Federal […]
Victorian Attorney-General Rob Hulls has announced a plan for teen judges, prosecutors and jurors to dispense justice to young offenders. Though they wouldn’t be allowed to pass any serious sentences, just Chinese burns and wedgies. / just sulky silences and cutting themselves. / but they would be allowed to gang up on the accused on […]