An outrage has been caused by Youtube footage of Sydney boys as young as four in a boxing bout. Awww. It’s like Pet Rocky.
But I tell you what, their little black eyes are so cute!
The kids’ parents have said it’s the last time they have Anthony Mundine babysit.
It’s easy to get 4-year-olds fighting – just tell them the other one stole their Pokemons.
What’s the big deal? 4-year-olds are fighting all the time anyway – at least this way, they’re forced to wear padded gloves.
The real controversy isn’t the boxing – it’s that some of the kids are dosing up on red cordial before the fights. SHAME!
One of the boys appears unsteady on his feet and tries to walk away but is forced to box on. Come on, kid, no-one likes a quitter!
The footage was filmed by one of the kids’ 15-year-old brother. It was great, because it’s so hard to hold the camera still if you’re doing the bullying yourself. / He’s just outsourcing his bullying.
What’s the big deal? It’s just combining kids’ love of fighting with their love of dress-ups.
It’s despicable, deplorable, and unjustifiable. That kind of violence is only acceptable if there’s a football involved. / I mean, if there was a football involved, that’d be okay.
There are differences between the younger fights and their adult counterparts. In the adult version, you’re not allowed to use the Chinese Burn, the Nipple Cripple, or the Atomic Wedgie. And in the kiddie version, you’re allowed to piss your pants and keep on playing.
Many adults actually prefer having children in the ring. They’re really easy to beat. / to kick the shit out of.
It’s a great way of taking that pent-up aggression that children can’t vent in the schoolyard, and fuelling it into something constructive. As far as smashing another kid in the head can be called constructive.
But boxing’s a sport! If more young kids took up boxing instead of the Playstation, we’d have a nation of fit, strong, healthy children, who just need a little bit of help with their drooling.
But boxing’s a sport! If more young kids took up boxing instead of the Playstation, we’d have a nation of fit, strong, healthy children, beating the living shit out of the weaker ones.
Come on. The likes Lionel Rose, Jeff Fenech and Lester Ellis would never have been boxing champs if, right from a young age, they hadn’t had their brains damaged.
At least with boxing gloves on they can’t pinch. / do a Chinese Burn.
At least this way, by the time they get to school, they’ll be able to defend themselves – as long as they happen to be wearing big red padded gloves at the time.
At least this way they can get their brains damaged BEFORE they get to school.
The surprising part is not that the young kiddies are fighting, but that it was in a gym with padded protection, and not out behind the shelter shed with bare knuckles, and the occasional broken bottle.
The Revesby Muslim Association distanced itself from the footage, saying it was shot without their knowledge after one of its organised boxercise classes. They’re strictly opposed to any toddler-boxing that’s not suitably euphemised.
As well as boxercise, the centre offers kickercise, stabbercise, and set-fire-to-the-corpsercise!
The centre claims the fight has nothing to do with them. Their bouts are always to the death!
The Muslim Association denied any link to the boxing match. A spokesman said that “religiously we’re not allowed to hit anyone in the head.” Though flying planes into buildings is religiously OK.
A spokesman said that “religiously we’re not allowed to hit anyone in the head.” Unless by “head” you mean “World Trade Centre”, and by “hit” you mean “crash into with a plane”.
The Muslim Association said that they weren’t allowed to hit anyone in the head, which is why they run boxercise classes instead of boxing. And because aerobics is totally gay. / They’d do regular exercise except that’s no good for punching people in the guts.
The 4-year-olds were only supposed to be doing boxercise. It would’ve all been OK if they’d just kept playing “Eye of the Tiger”. / But turn off that aerobics CD and you’re in trouble!
The kids’ boxing matches were organised by members of the Revesby Muslim Association. Allah loves that shit. / Because setting four-year-olds onto each other gives Allah jollies.
