George W Bush is making a renewed effort to catch Osama bin Laden before leaving office. Come on, surely he doesn’t still believe bin Laden is real.
George W Bush is making a renewed effort to catch Osama bin Laden before leaving office. Because, otherwise all he leaves history is an unwinnable war and a buncha gibberish. / all he leaves history is a series of unintentionally hilarious gaffes, a whole lotta dead Americans, and the word “nookyular”.
So far, unmanned fighter drones have blown up a house that, according to local villagers, is totally empty. Which makes sense, in a nonsensical search for a made-up villain by a man who isn’t really President. / who wasn’t really elected.
Bush wants to be remembered as the guy who caught Osama and killed Saddam Hussein. Rather than the guy who was mates with Osama’s family and killed thousands of innocent Iraqis.
As well as catching Osama bin Laden, Dubya wants to be remembered as the guy who killed Saddam Hussein, but I think he’s just being modest – he’s killed way more people than that! / he’s killed thousands more Iraqis than that!
As well as catching Osama bin Laden, Dubya wants to be remembered as the guy who killed Saddam Hussein – and not as the guy who executed 150 Americans before he was even President. / and not as the guy who sent thousands of American kids to die in an unwinnable war.
I wonder where he’ll invade to catch him this time… Mongolia? Canada? Antarctica? Of course – he’s probably disguised as a penguin!
It’s only been seven years since September 11. Yeah, this year we’ll get him for sure.
You know what? Seven years after bin Laden killed 3000 Americans, it probably is about time they went after him.
Bush is putting everything into the search for bin Laden this time. He’s now certain he’s not behind the couch, and is pretty sure he’s checked all the cupboards too.
bin Laden’s actually thinking of giving himself up. He’s bored.
A US intelligence source said if Bush can say he killed Saddam Hussein and captured bin Laden, he can claim to have left the world a safer place, in spite of the masses of evidence to the contrary.
A US intelligence source said if Bush can say he killed Saddam Hussein and captured bin Laden, then he can forget about all the terrible terrible things he’s done in the process.
Bush wants to be remembered as the guy who killed Saddam and captured bin Laden. Coz that whole killing Saddam thing didn’t really seem to help much.
Bush has a failsafe strategy for catching Osama: bomb EVERYWHERE.
And if Bush can’t catch bin Laden, he’s just going to have to fly a couple of planes into some Saudi skyscrapers and call it even stevens.
British and American special forces are for the first time taking part in regular missions across the Afghan border into the wild frontier region of Northern Pakistan, so the chances of them accidentally bumping into bin Laden are definitely increased.
And of course, if they can’t catch Osama, they can just say they’ve killed him instead – and that anyone who later turns up claiming to be bin Laden is clearly one of his doubles.
If Dubya can catch Osama now, maybe people will forget the seven years of waging irrelevant wars in between. Maybe.
This is the longest game of hide and seek Bush has ever played. And if he doesn’t find Osama soon, he’s going to give up. / play with someone else.
Bush says he really wants to catch bin Laden. “I just love hide and seek!” / And after that, they might play on the monkey bars.
Bush says he really wants to find bin Laden. And after that, it’s Osama’s turn to find him. / And after that, Bush gets to hide. / He’s hanging out for his turn to hide. / He’s thought of a really good hiding spot for his turn.
The operations involve the use of unmanned aerial vehicles called Predators and Reapers, fitted with Hellfire missiles. Sure sounds like we’re the good guys. / Yeah, the US is on God’s side…
The operations involve the use of unmanned aerial vehicles called Predators and Reapers, fitted with Hellfire missiles, but bin Laden is continuing to protect himself with his Cape of Allah and Shield of Virgins.
The main problem with using Predators to hunt for bin Laden is that, when they catch him, they’ll just rip out his spinal cord, fly back to their home-world, and use it as a trophy. Bush wants to do that himself.
Bush really wants to find bin Laden, and ask him how he retains his awesome popularity rating.
Bush is meeting with British PM Gordon Brown to discuss capturing bin Laden and what it’s like being less popular leaders than Robert Mugabe.
Bush recently met with British PM Gordon Brown to discuss bin Laden. If only they’d invited Brendan Nelson they could have an unpopularity contest.
