A California man says he can see the image of the Virgin Mary in his leg after a motorcycle accident. Wear a helmet, kids.
Interestingly doctors have confirmed that his leg wasn’t actually injured, but the concussion is still rather nasty.
Lipton believes the Virgin Mary protected him from further injury, and refuses to have treatment for that gaping brain wound. / but refuses to believe in the “massive head trauma” everyone else keeps going on about.
Not only can he see Mary in the wound on his leg, but since the accident he can talk to God! / he hears the voices of angels!
A man can see the Virgin Mary in a graze on his leg. And you don’t wanna know where he can see Mary Magdalene.
He believes the Virgin Mary helped save him from a horrific motorbike crash. Which is only fitting, as the accident was almost certainly caused by that last couple of Bloody Marys.
He believes the Virgin Mary helped save him from a horrific motorbike crash. At least, she claimed she was a virgin.
Because, of course, if you’re going to save someone, you make yourself appear as a graze on their leg. I do it all the time.
She may have saved his life, but I don’t know if I’d trust someone who’s willing to spend all that time carving their face into your wounds.
He’s thankful that she saved his life, but he’s not so thankful that she felt it necessary to carve her face into his wounds.
He thinks it was the Virgin Mary who saved his life. But he’s not so sure who carved her picture into his leg.
The pus-sy bits are the eyes! / The scabby bits are the eyes!
But she carved her picture into his legwounds! It’s not Mary who saved him – it’s Saw!
Marc Lipton believes the Virgin Mary protected him from injury other than the graze on his leg. Either that or the leg was the only bit the psycho bitch got to.
Mac Lipton believes the Virgin Mary protected him from further injury when the motorcycle slid out from underneath him. She then mounted the bike, spun around and did a wheelie.
And he’s got Jesus in between his toes! That or tinea.
And he’s got a wart that looks like Tony Abbot! / a bunion that looks like Hitler! / haemorrhoids that look like the 12 Apostles!
He also believes his elbow is Napoleon.
The Virgin Mary, don’t be ridiculous! It actually looks like Oprah.
He knew it was the Virgin Mary because it appeared to be swaddling a baby, and yet her hymen was still intact.
He could tell it was the Virgin Mary because it was an unpenetrated gash. / clean gash. / there was blood on the gash.
As if it’s not hard enough being the world’s most famous virgin, now she’s being compared to a bloody wound. / a scab.
The Virgin Mary was ready to make another appearance. Apparently someone finally ate her grilled cheese sandwich.
In fact she’s more of a Bloody Mary. Which might explain the visions.
It does look like the Virgin Mary. But who’d’ve thought she looked so much like a scabby wound?
It does look like the Virgin Mary. Apparently she was covered in scabs, and only ever wore Band-Aids.
Thank goodness the Virgin Mary is up there in Heaven, saving us from death by motorbike and appearing in our leg wounds. Just like the Gospels said she would.
Well maybe it wouldn’t be a virgin if he stuck his stupid cockhead in it.
Interestingly, when it scabbed it actually looked more like a dirty big cockroach. Don’t know what she’s trying to tell us with that.
He just can’t stop singing “Amaaa-ziiiing Graze…”
He keeps on picking at it so that it won’t heal and ruin his blessing.
It does look like the Virgin Mary now, but when it heals, it’ll look like Mary the Burns-Victim. / the Virgin Mary with burns to her entire body. / the Virgin Mary covered in scar-tissue.
I don’t believe him, I think it’s all a ploy to sell his leg on eBay.
The man has since been caught sawing off his leg and trying to sell it on eBay.
