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Good News Week

Good Next Week (Good News Week 9/2/09: closing)

Tues, Feb. 10 Tomorrow’s the Israeli election. Vote the right way or else! Tomorrow sees the election in Israel. Hate to sound like a conspiracy theorist, but you know they’ve always got it rigged so that a Jew will win. Tomorrow, the 2009 Australian Disasters Conference will be held in Canberra, where they’ll talk about […]

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Bruce Film Good News Week News

Twenty-oh-nine? Already?

G’day folks, I figure what everyone visiting a blog at this time of year is looking for is some nice navel-gazing, a bit of reflection on the year gone by and/or some prognostications on the year ahead. Perhaps a list of the year’s best best-of lists of the year. Or some resolutions of things I […]

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Good News Week

2008: the year that was (Good News Week 24/11/08: monologue)

It was the year: Kevin Rudd apologised to the stolen generations. And Brendan Nelson told us why it was just tough love. Kevin Rudd apologised to the stolen generations. Or as Brendan Nelson preferred to phrase it, the borrowed-with-the-best-intentions generations. Kevin Rudd apologised to the stolen generations. And Brendan Nelson apologised for having to apologise. […]

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Good News Week

Maldivers (Good News Week 24/11/08: What’s the Story)

The new President of the Maldives is going to divert a portion of the annual tourist revenue into a fund to buy a new homeland in case the islands disappear due to rising sea levels. Or if they can’t afford enough new land, perhaps some giant floaties. Or they could just don wetsuits and become […]

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Good News Week

The Rudd Wars (Good News Week 24/11/08: What’s the Story)

Kevin Rudd used Remembrance Day to announce a War on Unemployment. Inevitably, there will be casualties, but at the going down of the economy, we will remember them. Kevin Rudd used Remembrance Day to announce a War on Unemployment, following on from his previously announced wars on inflation, drugs, whalers, disadvantage, downloads, pokies, doping in […]

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Good News Week

Death to the Lipsynchers (Good News Week 24/11/08: Warren)

The Culture Ministry stipulates that artists must not “use pre-recorded songs or music to replace live singing or instrument-playing”. The Chinese Government believes that lying, manipulation and coverups don’t belong in the arts – they belong in politics. / should be restricted to politics. Chinese authorities plan to punish singers who lip-synch for “cheating the […]

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Good News Week

Madonna’s Custody List (Good News Week 24/11/08: Warren)

Madonna has demanded that newly-estranged hubby Guy Ritchie adhere to a strict 12-point list to get access to their sons Rocco and David, including a ban on newspapers, magazines, TV, photographs, meat, man-made fibres, spiritual and unethical toys, meeting Ritchie’s friends and water unblessed by Kabbalah religious leaders. It’s making Guy nostalgic – it’s just […]

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Good News Week

Armless Robbery (Good News Week 24/11/08: So You Think You Can Mime)

Munich police are hunting a man with no arms who walked out of a store with a 60cm TV. That’s what you call unarmed robbery. The security staff were too busy watching out for armed robbers. The man had the TV clamped to him by two accomplices. They would have stolen the TV themselves, but […]

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Good News Week

Foreskins For Fashion (Good News Week 24/11/08: So You Think You Can Mime)

Skin cells cultured from babies’ foreskins are being injected into faces as a wrinkle treatment. They claim that the treatment is permanent, although your face does temporarily get some wrinkles just after you go pee-pee. It’s great if you want your wrinkle treatment to be permanent, or if botulism toxin is just not quite a […]

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Good News Week

Mo guns (Good News Week 24/11/08: 3 1/2 Corners)

Sales of guns are on the rise in the US with Barack Obama’s victory – although that’s mainly just to assassins, lone gunmen, and the KKK. Sales of firearms are on the rise in the US as gun enthusiasts try to circumvent potential firearms restrictions brought in by the change of government. Not that Obama’s […]