Tues, Oct. 14 On Tuesday, Wayne Carey will face U.S. court for assaulting police. His best chance, and it’s a long shot, is to try to convince the courts it was actually Jim Carrey. Wayne Carey will trial in the U.S. for assaulting police, but his defence will collapse when he attacks the judge. / […]
Category: Good News Week
In the lead up to the Olympics, Chinese officials have closed down bars and clubs, expelled prostitutes and clamped down on entertainment. Because they want to show the world a Beijing just as dull as the world expects. Because the last thing you want at an Olympic Games is entertainment. In the lead up to […]
Just days before the Beijing Olympics, evidence has emerged of a massive doping trade in China. So the good news is there should be heaps of world records! Well, China may have banned late-night fun, foreign reporters, eating dogs, prostitution, and being black or Mongolian, but at least you can still dope. And, even harder […]
Airlines are taking drastic measures to save weight and cut fuel costs, thinking even of cutting back on plastic cutlery. Yeah, maybe instead of that heavyweight plastic cutlery they can make knives and forks out of paper. Or feathers. To reduce weight on planes, some airlines are thinking of scrapping their knives and forks, and, […]
Australian Olympians are being offered a special kit to help them protest against China’s involvement in Tibet. The pack includes a T-shirt bearing the slogan “I support human rights” in English and Mandarin, though it’s unfortunately not bullet proof. The pack includes a T-shirt bearing the slogan “I support human rights” in English and Mandarin, […]
A body-building competition has generated controversy when they recently let a bikini-clad 10 year-old girl enter. Community groups are up in arms – body-building could ruin all her chances of being a lingerie model. / body-building could ruin all her chances of looking totally hot. There’s nothing wrong with young girls flexing their abs in […]
An apt Darwin Award nominee: a Catholic priest died after grabbing a karaoke microphone while dripping wet. Onlookers said they’d never heard such a passionate performance. At first, onlookers didn’t realise he’d been electrocuted, they just thought it was an excellent Ian Curtis impersonation. / Johnny Rotten impersonation. It was bloody good version of “She’s […]
The sack race has been given the sack and the three-legged race run out of town, with a British primary school dropping the events from a sports day to minimise risk. The egg-and-spoon race is still allowed, despite suggestions that it was unfair on the poor little eggs. / The egg-and-spoon race is still allowed […]
112 Beijing restaurants have been ordered to keep dog off their menus for the duration of the Olympics so as not to offend Westerners. But that’s why most Westerners go to China in the first place! 112 Beijing restaurants have been ordered to keep dog off their menus for the duration of the Olympics so […]
China’s Olympics organisers are primed to mobilise an army of up to 37,000 people to ensure that rain doesn’t ruin the opening ceremony. If rain looks like it’s threatening, they all look up at the clouds and blow. FFFFFFFFF! The Chinese Weather Modification Bureau has 37,000 personnel, 30 aircraft, and 6781 anti-aircraft guns. In case […]