Church of England leaders are encouraging clergy to study Dr Who and use examples in their sermons. Seems that the old Bible stories don’t have enough lasers. / daleks. Church leaders say Dr Who is kinda like Christ, the Tardis is kinda like a church, and K-9 is kinda like the robot dog that Jesus […]
Category: Good News Week
Tues, May 27 On Tuesday it’s 3 years since Schapelle Corby was convicted of drug trafficking, and she’ll drown her sorrows with a mug of filthy prison wine. It’s made from real fermented rats! It’s three years since Schapelle Corby was convicted, and Aussie backpackers everywhere will swear off marijuana and get onto untrialled experimental […]
Rudd government ministers are being charged $1300 each per annum to pay for snacks in cabinet meetings, up from $50 under the previous government. And that’s even with Kim Beazley retired. Rudd government ministers are being charged $1300 each per annum to pay for snacks in cabinet meetings. But larks’ tongues aren’t cheap. / But […]
Troublesome patients are being forced to sign behaviour contracts in order to stay in hospital. In return, doctors have to sign contracts ensuring they don’t give you a liver transplant when you come in for an ingrown toenail. Troublesome patients are being forced to sign behaviour contracts in order to stay in hospital. Doctors, however, […]
There’s a huge boom in children’s etiquette classes, particularly in America. Rude kids? In America? Don’t know where they’d get that from. Rather than cutlery and curtsies, the curriculum nowadays stresses social skills and common courtesy, including handshakes, helpfulness, and when to blow someone away in Halo. Rather than cutlery and curtsies, the curriculum nowadays […]
In South Korea, they’ve cloned seven sniffer dogs. Which is fantastic – dogs are so hard to come by any other way. Cloned dogs are great cloned-sheep-dogs. / at rounding up cloned sheep. They’ve been specially bred for rounding up Dolly. Unfortunately they can only all smell the same thing. In South Korea, seven cloned […]
A New Yorker jailed for murdering a man and burning down his home is suing the county for losing weight while imprisoned. He’s down to 140 kilos and now finds it nearly impossible to kill people just by sitting on them. The jail only serves cold food, and very rarely offers deep-fried lard dogs. / […]
In order to curb one of the world’s highest road tolls, dangerous drivers in Iran are being sentenced to 74 lashes. It’s the 74th lash that always changes behaviour. / 73 just wasn’t doing it. The roads are a deathtrap. Bad drivers can be sentenced to jail or the lash, and really bad drivers are […]
US magician David Blaine has set another world record by holding his breath for over 17 minutes on the Oprah Winfrey show. Well, her audience can get a trifle whiffy. US magician David Blaine has set another world record by holding his breath for over 17 minutes on the Oprah Winfrey show. Now that’s a […]
A Russian priest has claimed he was tricked into giving a sacred blessing to a strip club. He’d been told it was a ballet school, and he even took time to enjoy a little of that modern lap-ballet while he was there. The owners of the bar convinced him that it was a new modern […]