A 65-year-old German amateur pilot has lost his license after flying while four times over the legal limit and radioing the control tower to ask “Where the bloody hell have you hidden yourself?” He was so pissed, he not only started speaking English, but doing a Steve Irwin impression.
A 65-year-old German amateur pilot has lost his license after flying while four times over the legal limit and radioing the control tower to ask “Where the bloody hell have you hidden yourself?” And this is how they lost the war.
He’s 65, was absolutely pissed to the eye-sockets, and flew and landed a plane. He doesn’t deserve to lose his licence – he deserves a medal!
It’s not all bad news, however – the man has now got himself a job with Qantas.
He was found to be four times over the legal alcohol limit for driving a car. But you should be able to be that pissed while flying a plane – it’s not like there’s anything up there to hit.
He was so pissed he actually forgot he was flying a plane. Although that would explain why he didn’t fit in the drive-thru.
The main problem wasn’t that he was pissed. It was that he kept picking up hitchhikers.
He even sang a few songs while he was trying to land the plane. But that’s just because he mistook the black box for a karaoke machine.
He said he needed to land the plane, so he could drive his car – to a party. This man knows how to live!
He said he needed to land the plane, so he could drive his car – to a party. Politicians, huh.
It turned out the control tower had hidden itself behind the giant green goblin.
Those control towers, eh? Always sneaking off for a quick little drinkie.
The control tower was still there. It was just obscured by vomit. / He’d just had a massive ralph on top of it. / He’d just had a massive chunder on the windscreen.
Don’t drink and drive over point-0-5. Kilometres.
He also sang a few songs and cracked a mother-in-law joke. Yeah, those mother-in-laws, they’re such hopeless drivers…
He told the controllers to pull their fingers out, as he had a party to go to. He’d fly there direct if they didn’t keep moving the location.
Drunken pilots endanger us all. Clearly, what we need is some sort of flying boozebus. / a booze-blimp.
He had to follow a helicopter home. If only they let drink-drivers do that. / Though he was torn between that and following the flying pink elephant.
He even tried to play chicken. But it wasn’t until he splattered into them that he realised they were actually seagulls.
It turns out all those little pedestrians had actually been seagulls.
He was so blind, he didn’t actually realise he was in a plane. He just thought the flight simulator at the pokies had just gotten a lot more realistic.
He’s gotten drunk and flown many times before. But he was very surprised to discover that this time there was an actual plane involved.
After abusing the control tower he couldn’t find, cracking jokes, singing songs, and having to have a helicopter guide him back, the bloke, reeking of alcohol, wobbled from the cockpit to his car and drove off. Weirdly, he actually got more altitude in the car.
He was unable to read the instruments to tell where the Schoengleida airfield was. But it’ll make a great story for Show’n’Glider. / So they had to get a helicopter to show ‘im gliding.
