Two pieces of footage have turned up from Poland appearing to show a yeti – in one of them, spying on a bikini-clad bather. And now we know, it’s not just his feet that are big. I’m terrified of Yetis! Not just their gruesome, hairy appearance and brutal strength, but their incredible power to ruin […]
Monday, September 21 Kevin Rudd turns 52, which in anyone’s language is a fair old shake of the sauce bottle. Kevin Rudd will turn 52! He’s looking forward to tucking into his big birthday cake made of earwax. Kevin Rudd will turn 52! He’s going to get Peter Garret to jump out of a yellow […]
Eight rescuers worked for days to dig a four-metre tunnel and used expanding airbags to move boulders – and all to rescue an 8-year-old deaf dog named Scooby. And they’d have succeeded too, if it wasn’t for those meddling kids! Sounds like a job for Scooby-Doo! Oh, right. Scooby had chased a rabbit down a […]
Taxpayers funded $10 million worth of leaflets printed by MPs leading up to the last election. I’ll vote for anyone who doesn’t spend my money on getting me to vote for them! If only I knew who they were. / If only there was some way they could let me know. / If only they […]
Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi says he’s prepared to go to court to fight media accusations he’s a dirty old man, & impotent. Silvio can get it up any time. All you need to do is provide him with an underage prostitute. He claims he’s not impotent, and he’s willing to stand up in court […]
Britney Spears stunned fans by actually singing live at a concert in the U.S. Although that wasn’t the biggest shock – it was that she was fully clothed. / it was that she was actually a man. With a full beard. Britney Spears stunned fans by actually singing live at a concert in the U.S. […]
Tony Negus has taken over as the new Commissioner of the Australian Federal Police. The old one went ‘wee wee wee’ all the way home. It’s not hard to become Commissioner of the AFP. It’s one simple test: “Four legs good, two legs bad”. Negus said the primary focus of the AFP would be to […]
It’s been one year since the beginning of the global financial crisis. If only we could afford to buy it a cake. Happy birthday to you You make me feel blue Daddy jumped from a window Think I just might too. What do you get a one-year old global financial crisis for its birthday? It’s […]
Australian captain Ricky Ponting has retired from international Twenty-20 cricket, in a bid to extend his test career. Yes, that’s right – to improve his skills at cricket, he’s going to do much less of it. / going to play it less often. Australian captain Ricky Ponting has retired from international Twenty-20 cricket, in a […]
Hawthorn President Jeff Kennett has said he hopes that the Hawks will be the first AFL club to field a female player. But women’s groups say it’s unlikely that the first women players would play for Hawthorn. Brown and gold, are you kidding? / No girl would be seen dead in the “poos and wees”. […]