A British man has begun holding exclusive dinner parties where the only meat served is roadkill. Just a suggestion – steer clear of the trifle. He says he first got the idea when he ate some McNuggets. But it’s not like he just scrapes a dead thing off the road and pops it on a […]
A woman in Pennsylvania wants to marry a 25 metre gondola ride called “1001 Nacht”. She has a genuine fairground attraction. After a courtship lasting over 10 years, an American woman is going to marry the love of her life – a magic carpet fairground ride. Which is a slap in the face to those […]
Tuesday, August 25 Kevin Rudd & his cabinet will meet the public in Port Macquarie, after a few bottles of Macquarie Port. Kevin Rudd & his cabinet will meet the public in Port Macquarie. Sounds wet. The National Country Music Muster will be held in Gympie, and the the Bondage and Discipline Sado-Muster will be […]
As the ALP & the Liberals raced to see who could reward the big polluters even more, the Nationals vowed to create a climate change policy of their own. In their one, we just set fire to pandas. As the ALP & the Liberals raced to see who could reward the big polluters even more, […]
The Defence Dept. is calling for design submissions for the navy’s next generation of submarine, to replace its Collins Class boats. And this time, they’re even going to LOOK at them. Ah, the Collins Class – the underwater capability of a sack full of kittens, with the good looks of a dugong. But at least […]
There were claims Australian GPs are hosting Botox parties for female patients. It may be a breach of ethics, but it sure reduces the seven signs of aging! The parties have door prizes donated by cosmetic surgery companies – and you should see the pinata! The parties have door prizes donated by cosmetic surgery companies, […]
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NReaLity (GNW 17/8/09: monologue)
The newest reality series? Find a new NRL star! The show will be called “NRL Dream”, as the NRL weren’t so rapt with the original title “MasterMoron”. / “MasterThug”. / “MasterMeathead”. / “MasterRapist”. The contestants have to abseil down a bridge, box Anthony Mundine, and pull an Airbus. Clearly, the makers of the show have […]
Michael Jackson is buried in an unmarked plot at Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Hollywood. The exact location is being kept secret so fans don’t descend on the cemetery & damage or deface the grave. See – told you he wasn’t dead. Michael Jackson is buried in an unmarked plot at Forest Lawn Memorial Park […]
Australia’s top botanist says Australia should dump the “European mentality” & make up our own seasons. I suggest we have just 2: “Beanies” and “Budgiesmugglers”. / “Indoors” and “Out”. Dr. Tim Entwhistle argues we have at least 5 seasons. So we should name them after the Daddos. Dr. Tim Entwhistle argues we have at least […]
N.S.W. police have warned pedestrians who listen to iPods or text while crossing the road that they could be fined or even jailed if they cause an accident. Because copping a fine will really teach them a lesson that being hit by a car didn’t. / Because jail time will teach you a lesson that […]