Kevin Rudd has conceded that his plan to overhaul the nation’s health system will be expensive. But it’ll all be worth it if he shuts up. According to the Prime Minister, overhauling the nation’s health system will not be cheap. But it will be dodgy! According to the Prime Minister, overhauling the nation’s health system […]
In New Zealand, a woman has had to be rescued from an overly playful dolphin who wouldn’t let her back into shore. That’s the last time she goes swimming dressed as a fish. / as a beachball. But Moko was just having innocent fun. She LOVES playing “drown the human”! / “Drown the weak pink […]
Police in Minnesota are looking for a 31-year-old man who has a sexual fetish for slashing rubber balls. Not to arrest him, mind you – just for discreet fun times. Minnesota police are chasing a man with a sexual fetish for slashing rubber exercise balls. Soon he’ll have enough for his own gimp suit that […]
The Church of England has launched a new “two-in-one” wedding and baptism service, allowing you to tie the knot and the cord in one go. Of course, it can be quite confronting listening to any prayer that begins “Dear Lord Jesus, please forgive these slutty fornicators and their bastard spawn…” The only downside is that […]
A Japanese man has spent three years with his girlfriend – a pillow featuring a drawing of an adolescent girl. She is the perfect partner: she never argues with him, she’s 100% faithful, and she’s machine washable. He says that, unlike his previous girlfriend, she is loving, committed, and half polyester. And there’s nothing he […]
Tuesday, August 04 The world’s longest golf course will be finished at Ceduna. The only way to get a hole-in-one is to airlift the ball to the other end. The world’s longest golf course will be finished at Ceduna. One day, I hope to hit a hole-in-58. The world’s longest golf course will be finished […]
Primary school students in Tokyo are being taught by a robot. It’s great for maths, not so hot for phys ed. The robo-teacher even gets angry when the kids misbehave. And unlike human teachers, it can exterminate them. It can discipline children, organise tasks, call the roll, and spin around shrieking “DOES NOT COMPUTE” – […]
British scientists have developed a virtual reality helmet that recreates all five senses. At long last you can live life without actually being there! The helmet recreates the sights, sounds, smells and even tastes of the original experience. Now, no-one will ever have to actually go anywhere ever again! They call it Real Virtuality. It’s […]
Scientists are developing an artificial nose that will be able to detect the smell of fear, sniff for stress, and create olfactory “fingerprints” of suspects. Unfortunately the machine refuses to work until the scientists have a good long shower, change their shoes, and have a couple of extremely strong mints. Scientists are developing a device […]
The solution to the world’s urban transportation problems could be a new high tech electric automated dual-wheel person-carrying machine. Or we could all just use our bikes. The Personal Urban Mobility and Accessibility project imagines vehicles with access to a vast communications network, allowing them to automatically interact, monitor traffic, and prevent crashes. Or we […]