Naked Germans can now fly, unencumbered by annoying clothing. And their clothing can be transported in a separate plane, unencumbered by fat sweaty Germans.
Of course a nude flight is potentially more exposing than a nude beach. Rolling over to hide an unwanted erection could just make things worse, depending on who you roll into.
Just watch out if the tray table next to you starts to rise slowly.
In keeping with the nude theme, all in-flight salad will be served without dressing.
They’ve got some great food available too, including Wiener schnitzel, nude strudel and fatwurst. / showerkraut.
Though I don’t suggest you order the Wiener schnitzel.
For those a little more modest, they also offer off-the-shoulder flights. / backless flights. / topless flights.
A German airline has begun running special naked flights for naturists. They’re great fun, but you do get some funny looks in the departure lounge.
Unfortunately, if you’re really well hung, you have to store it in the overhead lockers. (Not that I’ll be having that problem…)
It’s a return to nature. When our cavemen ancestors were flying first-class around the world, they were probably totally naked too.
The naked folk call themselves “naturists”, and pride themselves on living natural lives. Which means, if they want to go to another country, they shouldn’t be flying – they should be swimming.
It’s also an anti-terrorist technique – when you’re totally starkers, it’s pretty hard to hide that bomb. / you’ve got to be really careful where you hide that stanley-knife.
It sure makes the strip-search quicker.
With so many naked sweaty people crammed in together, it can get a little LuftWhiffy.
The safety demonstration video is now available via an online subscription service.
Authorities are keeping an eye out that no perverts want to board these flights fully clothed.
It does make for a heightened atmosphere of sexuality. In fact the queues for the toilets are quite long, and in pairs.
It’s a flight where anything goes! As well as being nude, you’ll also be able to take drugs and murder people.
As well as totally naked flights, they’re also offering flights where you can be totally clothed, for no extra fee!
The Germans are also offering flights where only the stewardesses are totally naked – and, for an extra fee, you can get someone to shit on your face!
The airline also offers a Laundromat service that washes the Germans’ clothes while they fly; they’re the leader in hosin’ liederhosen.
Of course porn is also available on the flight, though you have to tip the stewardesses.
The most recent flight encountered severe turbulence, and one woman took an eye out.
