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Glass House

Poor Reception (cut from The Glass House 15/6/05)

A Florida woman pulled a gun on her TV repairman, telling him: “You’re not leaving until the TV is fixed.” She was going to see Survivor one way or another…

She was said to have been inspired by Desperate Housewives…

I can understand why TV would drive you to that. You wouldn’t want to miss The Glass House…

We were going to have her on the show, but it was the one time we weren’t able to “communicate with her” (wobbly hand motion directly at camera) through the screen…

Police searching the woman’s background have discovered the bodies of a plumber, an encyclopaedia salesman, the Jehovah’s witnesses and a singing fat-o-gram.

Inspired by the publicity, the TV repair business has a new offer – “we do the job in an hour, or you shoot us!” Sales have skyrocketed, as have TV repairman deaths.

She got a new TV out of the deal! If she’d held up a bit longer, she might’ve got a DVD player out of him…

She got a new TV out of it! If she’d shot him, she would’ve also gotten a bonus DVD player… it’s a good offer.

She tried shooting him, but the gun didn’t work. And when the gun repairman came, she said he had to fix the gun, or he wouldn’t be able to watch T.V.

The woman had a history of mental illness; it turned out she’d been forcing the repairman to try to get a picture on a microwave oven – and the gun was actually a cucumber. “I’m not even a repairman,” said the hapless avon lady.

By Wok and Mat

Warwick Holt and Mat Blackwell are long-time writing partners, who created the mega-award winning web series Bruce, and wrote loads of jokes for TV shows including Good News Week, The Sideshow and The Glass House. Several years of their raw material for those shows is posted right here on this blog.

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