Glass House

Latham Accidentally Inspires Party (cut from The Glass House 12/10/05)

A new political party has sprung up, inspired by Mark Latham’s recent outbursts. Latham was disturbed to hear he’d accidentally inspired a political party. “I’m trying to humiliate parties!”

The party is basing themselves on Latham’s principles. A warning if you’re thinking of joining – don’t shake their hands. (You might end up with a broken arm.)

The party settled on calling themselves People Power, which won out by a small margin over The Party of Opportunity, The SqueezeEasers, and The Conga-Line Of Blowholes.

The party stands for smaller government and a giving ordinary, unheard people a voice. It’s Mark Latham’s voice, and it can hurl insults at 50 paces!

The party gives ordinary people a voice, as long as they use it to slag off co-workers and blame their mistakes on everyone else.

The party focuses on disabilities, mental health, gambling, poker machines, red tape, and assaulting taxi drivers.

Latham, inspired, has started his own party, called Latham Power. It tries to give a voice to all the Mark Lathams out there! Erm…

The party is opposed to big government, big business and big unions, and has attracted over 1500 members. A spokesman admitted that they were now so big that they had to oppose themselves.

So that’s another thing they’ve learnt from Latham: to oppose their own party.

It’s good timing for Latham; he’d just about run out of parties that’d let him join.

And when the party falls apart, publishers will have 1500 new diaries on the market…

The group are going to stand for 16 candidates at the next Victorian elections. If they do well, they’re going to work hard to deliver smaller governments by abolishing their own positions. “It’s a small step, but if we win enough elections we’ll be able to empty Parliament House!”

People Power are hoping to provide an alternative to fossil fuels: People Power. “It’ll be just like the Flintstones!” said a spokesman. “Yabbadabbadoo!”

By Wok

Warwick Holt is a highly experienced, award-winning screenwriter, who has written for many of Australia’s top comedians and presenters, and the Emperor of this here Media Empire.

Leave a Reply