Oprah’s not gay (The Glass House 2/8/06)

Oprah Winfrey has stated that despite rumours to the contrary she is definitely not gay. Of course she’s not gay – she just broke up with her boyfriend of 20 years! She left him because he wouldn’t commit – to the sex change operation…

Oprah and her best friend of 30 years, Gayle King, say that there’s no definition in our culture for the type of bond they have. “Whatever this friendship is, it’s been a very fun ride.” Especially when she wears the strap-on.

Oprah denied she was gay as a part of her special show on “Outed Celebrities Who Still Claim They’re Straight”. / Oprah denied she was gay on the Jerry Springer show, “I’m An Outed Celebrity Who Still Claims I’m Straight”.

Even though she’s not gay, her show still is…

Unfortunately, publicly stating that you’re not gay tends to increase speculation that you are. Just look at Thorpie…

Other celebrities to recently state that they’re not gag include John Michael Howson, Boy George, and Julian Clary. (“Sorry, it was all an act!”)

You’ll see Oprah at the next Mardi Gras, on the “I’m Not Gay But I’ve Got Nothing Against Gays, I Mean, Some Of My Best Friends Are Gay” float…

She might not be gay, but she still loves Bush…

Not only is Oprah not gay, she’s not even black. She’s actually a six foot Nazi grandfather…

She’s definitely not gay. Although her girlfriend is…

“There’s nothing with being gay. I love gays! Regularly!”

Oprah’s got nothing against lesbians – some of her favourite boyfriends have been lesbians.

She’s as hetrosexual as a woman who no longer goes out with men can be.

Oprah’s published the revelation in her magazine O. Previous editions have featured hard-hitting articles like “Oprah’s Not Fat”, “Wow, How Hot Is Oprah”, and their special on “Oprah Winfrey – Woman of the Year! Again!”

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