Armless Robbery (Good News Week 24/11/08: So You Think You Can Mime)

Munich police are hunting a man with no arms who walked out of a store with a 60cm TV. That’s what you call unarmed robbery.

The security staff were too busy watching out for armed robbers.

The man had the TV clamped to him by two accomplices. They would have stolen the TV themselves, but they preferred to make their robberies freaky!

The man had the TV clamped to him by two accomplices. It was easier than trying to steal a TV stand as well.

The man had the TV clamped to him by two accomplices. Now he’s just waiting for them to come home so he can be unclamped.

Now he’ll have to grow an extra long neck to watch it.

Police are on the lookout for a TV that’s grown a head and legs.

Staff noticed the TV was missing from its stand, and then saw the heist on CCTV recordings. Staff didn’t pick him up at the time as they thought he was just the regular no-armed TV service man.

They’d previously tried stealing a TV with a one-armed man but that flailing arm was just too obvious.

Security staff would have stopped him if they weren’t laughing so hard.

They were distracted by the guy with no legs stealing a home theatre system.

They weren’t worried about him taking the TV. They knew he’d never be able to use the remote.

Of course, the hardest part was balancing the set-top-box on his head.

His two accomplices strapped the TV to him, and they all left together. Kinda makes you wonder why the two guys with arms didn’t just steal it themselves. Hmmm.

He was helped out by 2 accomplices. One was his right hand man. And one was his left.

I’m surprised when they were planning the theft that they didn’t just say, “Y’know Stumpy, why don’t you just stay home.” / stay home and play soccer.”

It’s a great story of affirmative action. Being arm-impaired wasn’t going to stop him getting into the electrical appliance theft game!

He must have been drunk to think he could get away with it. Not just armless, but legless.

Weird to think he stole a TV with no arms. Normally that’s the kind of thing you’d do when you’re legless.

The man stole a TV with no arms. He much prefers them to TVs with arms. / He just hates TVs that have arms.

He would’ve tried stealing from the local casino, but it was already filled with one-armed bandits.

The security guards only realised what was happening when the program they were watching suddenly slipped out the door.

They thought he was just an injured teletubbie.

He didn’t really want to steal the TV, it was just the only way he could fulfil his life-long ambition to be a teletubbie.

Police say people should be on the look-out for a dude with no arms and a TV strapped to him. Shouldn’t be too hard, really…

The security guards said they would’ve stopped him, but they couldn’t see any ‘arm.

But don’t worry if you do see him – he’s ‘armless.

He was going to try to sell the TV at a second hand shop, but he realised there was no way he could access his wallet.

Staff didn’t see the robbery take place. Understandable. A walking TV just blends right into the background.

They saw him stealing the telly on the CCTV – just before that was nicked by a man with no head.

He almost got caught, but distracted police by switching over to one of their favourite shows. / by switching over to Crimestoppers.

He’s hoping to trade the TV for some prosthetic arms. And then they’ll never catch him!

It’s not surprising he’s escaped. It’s hard to tell whether someone with a TV strapped to their chest has arms or not.

The real giveaway is the antenna on his head.

Police have released an identikit picture of the felon. Though the no-arms thing may also be a giveaway.

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