Tues, March 24 Barack Obama will meet Kevin Rudd for the first time. Ruddy will never have looked so lame. Barack Obama will meet Kevin Rudd for the first time, and pick up some tips on gently dashing the hopes of your followers. Kevin Rudd will meet Barack Obama and in the great tradition of […]
Month: March 2009
It’s all happening in Canberra. The number of job ads is plummeting as the govt. tries to get its new I.R. laws passed. Certainly there’s been a lot of layoffs in the WorkChoices advertising sector. Though unions will be on the look out for a fresh bunch of heavies. We were warned… The government is […]
Advances in embryonic cell analysis has meant a Los Angeles fertility clinic is able to offer designer babies. At last my five-armed, nine-legged baby will no longer be just a crazy dream. It’s great! With this technology, finally I can have a baby that looks just like Mikey. My prayers have been answered! Sure, but […]
Kevin Rudd has created a political shit-storm by appearing on TV and uttering the phrase “political shit-storm”. Huh! Sounds like someone’s trying to cash in on the Underbelly phenomenon. It really is the only way you can compete with Underbelly. Really? Shit! You can swear on TV? No-one told me… He’s opened the floodgates. Now […]
It’s small, hard, you can slide your hand along to make it bigger, and the Pope doesn’t want you touching it. That’s right – it’s a mobile phone. Monsignor Benito Cocchi has called on the faithful to avoid modern modes of communication for Lent. Not telephones of course, God’s cool with any communication devices pre-1980. […]
American politicians opposed to the death penalty are arguing that it should be abolished to cut costs. And some sort of gobbledygook about “human rights”, “valuing life”, blah blah blah. American politicians opposed to the death penalty are arguing that it should be abolished to cut costs. Because what other argument could there be? / […]
A 12-year-old Hong Kong schoolboy posted naked pictures of himself online and offered to be a prostitute to females between the ages of 10 and 45. He just knows that female paedophile market remains mostly untapped. The boy, calling himself Little Leung, described himself as a Christian and offered to make love for $144. Unfortunately, […]
Tues, March 17 And tomorrow, once again the footpaths will be green with vomit for St. Patrick’s Day! St. Patrick’s Day will see green beer, brewed entirely from renewable energy and old-growth forests. Unfortunately, tomorrow’s Telstra Australian Swimming Championships will be put on hold. The Telstra Australian Swimming Championships in Sydney – which is just […]
This year’s 51st Logie Awards will face budget cuts and a trimmed invite list. Unfortunately it seems there’s no chance of losing Richard Wilkins. / Please let it be Richard Wilkins… Celebrities at the Logies can expect to party til the break of 9:30. Two event companies have been briefed to bid for the event […]
The credit crunch is hitting home so hard that even Australian 6-year-olds are raising concerns. It’s even worse in America, where 6-year-olds have had to default on their mortgages. Many kids are now imitating their dads: climbing to the top of the cubbyhouse and jumping off. Several kids have had their pocket money cut, and […]